Elucidating Questions

You pulled me out of the way

You weren’t speaking

I was afraid

You are so afraid of people being upset that you speak that you don’t speak when it’s important anymore

I hope she’s okay.

She was so mad at herself I could feel it.

Even though it wasn’t her fault.

Do you think we did good?

I think the crows have the answer.

You pulled me out of the way

You weren’t speaking

I was afraid

You are so afraid of people being upset that you speak that you don’t speak when it’s important anymore

I hope she’s okay.

She was so mad at herself I could feel it.

Even though it wasn’t her fault.

Do you think we did good?

I think the crows have the answer.

Because Mars would be like my younger sister

Who always thought she was older than me for some reason

When she didn’t know I was always aware of those few so called short months between because I had to know

At the end of the day

Who was being held responsible for every action made

So Saturn like my brother who

I feel like we had such a bond and now he barely makes eye contact with me and I never understand why

And I

Then that feeling of the inevitable fall I know I won’t make the turn I won’t I

Paralysed myself with fear and

Down the hill into the earth

But that shock

Of hitting the ground and then

What is that sound it’s really weird is it a backfiring car?

Yes

I put off thoughts but I have to reach them eventually they don’t float away

Because I don’t either.

I just feel like I exist in three different ways all the time and it doesn’t quite

Match the world’s view of what I thought being human was

I hear one track mind

I have no idea what that means I can’t relate

Or remember relating

Too much ringing in my ears.

I don’t have to justify

I don’t know what but good to know I suppose

Scarlet rain and black rainbows.

Even if it hurts

Even if I’m angry

Even if I want to be able to scream

Even if you don’t stand with me I stand with you.

Don’t know why.

It’s who I am.

I notice intricacies of human behaviour.

Because even though I want to turn and bite

It doesn’t change the foundation of the thing I’m biting and

It’s not there I can’t see it

Trust me I looked I can’t just believe

Things I have to search through and pick apart and put back together

And hear every note every word usage every

Because if I hear it I leave.

Capacity

And

Ability

We all have it our bodies acting as bodies could do it but

The soul

The spirit and the heart.

They’d all have to come into alignment for the action to be taken

Or ignored and I

Don’t see someone who could just ignore that,

Even if they could all ignore this I don’t think

I hate that word

Think

Like my brain doesn’t think it of course it does it thought it backwards and forwards and frontwards and upwards and everywhere

Every aspect.

I don’t see someone with a storm who would want to hurt someone else with it

I see

Someone who would mask the pain and put it into poetry

Which by the way

By the way

Would require intensely twisted thought

To think that

And then produce the opposite

It just doesn’t fit

I’m very specific for very specific reasons but regardless of my specifity

I still know when there’s a person who I can’t trust

Elsewise I wouldn’t hand it out so freely it’s just that humans over time

Over time

They aren’t always the same humans

But that doesn’t change the goodness inside of them it is a reaction to the environment and the friction of what they want and need versus others

Some people lack it

He doesn’t

So either I’m incredibly confused or

It’s all just some mistakes that weren’t mistakes in the moment

And a lie.