Poetry
This is the general category of fuckery that goes on and on and doesn’t seem interested in stopping.
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I love you
Don’t stop fighting
I wish I could be closer
I wish I could give you freedom
I’ll be your ally in the dark
I will stand by you no matter what the judgement is
I’ve already realised
The truth under the lies
Not yours
The lies of a system which shouldn’t be broken
Because we should know what justice is
I’ll be here
I’m here
Stay strong
I love you
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The smoke flows out of the flowers
They look like they could be burning
Maybe they want to be
Capturing the air and keeping the smoke for what ever reason
What ever reason
He thinks I’m throwing away my life getting drunk getting high and hiding
He doesn’t know that life ran away from me and I just couldn’t keep up
He thinks I’m not trying
That I haven’t tried
He doesn’t remember how hard I tried to make everyone like me
He doesn’t know that he’s the only one
I wonder where he got three
Himself
My beloved
I think people know you’re here even though you’re not
You’re like a feeling they can’t get rid of
I wasn’t supposed to cry
Why or why not
I want to go to the party too I just don’t know how
I want someone to come with me
I don’t want to go alone
I don’t want to be alone
But no matter how hard I try
I’m always the last thought on their mind
Like the plants that didn’t think about where the smoke came from
They just accepted it as truth
No one sees me
They just look right through
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In the morning I’ll be somewhat alive
Just like I’m somewhat alive now
Fighting and fighting
You come up because I was thinking of you in moments I shouldn’t have
Because he was standing in the doorway
And I wondered if he was even really here
Like an ethereal being
Like no one else has as much patience
Like no one else has given me as many second chances
Like at the moment I wondered if he really cares
Like the moment I wonder if it’s all meaningless
When it has to end
Because it has to end
The one who holds me in arms empty burned away and gone
Where there’s no flesh to hold on to
When I feel safe
Where he is
Where he isn’t
I still love you
I will always love you
Yes I’m selfish and foolish
No I would never get bored of you
Yes I do know what who what I want
Come,
My golden haired beautiful gone boy
Let’s wrap ourselves in these blankets
And when I dream of you tonight
In the room where we walk talk explore
Dream
For hours
Come my beautiful compassionate boy
Let’s sleep
Come and sleep with me
I miss you I love you I look for you every day
Today you were the guy on his phone sighing exasperatedly
Tonight you’re the creak in the house
When I asked
Are you really?
And you said yes
And told me to go the fuck to sleep.
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Hey brother
Wake me up
I still don’t know how to understand
Where you go when you’re gone
But I know you don’t think I gave you a chance
I wish I could have
You see these lines where there’s no going back
That’s why he rests his head on my knee at the end of the day
All the regret from the weight
Neither of you should have had to carry it alone
I wish you had both known that you weren’t alone
Stop what?
Lamenting about pasts that can’t be changed?
Or talking to the dead people again?
If they hadn’t died I would have no one to talk to
And the heat of the warmth of the get up and shut the fuck up
That was the thought of a person so old
That dead doesn’t mean stopping anymore
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Falling
Fortitude
Forever
Forgotten
Flowers
Fall
For
Farther
Feathers
Feathered
Fonder
Finding
Failure
Feline
Figures
Forgiveness
Five
Fascinating
Faces
Four
Free
Figments
Forays
Firmly
Folded
Frozen
Fiddler
Fully
Found
Fear
From
Fitted
Flying
Foxes
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Standing on opposite sides of the tree
I missed you
Where did you go
But you were angry with me
But I was angry with you
You know I’ve been making
Stupid choices
But you know I don’t care about myself
Holding me close and whispering
Don’t lie
About what
If only it was so simple
Come with me
Hold my hand
Keep close
Because I missed you
But I don’t know why
You keep insisting I’m lying
What about, my long lost old friend who will be somewhere near
Until the end
Oh the end
Wrapped in tree branches
Whisper beside the grave
How can I make it matter?
I love you
I miss you
I’m not mad at you
For keeping me safe