Elucidating Questions

You can take it when the body has run out of water

You see me doing it I see you fucking with me

He doesn’t stop does he?

It’s a good deal right?

Because water is my favourite so I’m giving it up because it won’t matter what my favourite is ever

So this is what I’m doing because I know what you said but I can’t do this anymore

And everything is slow so who am I to hasten it

It’s going anyways I just haven’t been drinking

Anything except coffee and alcohol

Turns out it’s bad for you

I had no idea.

Just turn me to stone I know that you will

All these cruel games to trick my sense

Dangling carrots I’ll never have like here’s another coincidence

And watching as I struggle with the sheer fucked up ‘ness of it all

I’m so tired of it can’t you please just make it go away?

You’re right

I’m defeated

I lost

Please end the game now

I just wanted to be happy

That’s all I wanted

Learn what?

That scalding words that showed up as I was racing

My I went so far I realised all the things I love on a day to day basis will someday be gone

The stories will be gone

The characters will be gone

There will be nothing nothing left at all

They will have never lived

And no one will ever know

That’s such a sad story

Humming on by I see you now catching my eye what do you want?

A name? I’m not telling it’s a secret it’s mine I found it.

She doesn’t like me does she?

Jupiter’s wife

Justice’s wife

I think I’m being cursed a bit sometimes this feeling

But I did try

I did try you see I think they’re all lovely I really do love them all

But it does seem to fit me perfectly don’t you think?

My new name.

You’ll know it if you’re the messenger

But that’s about it

I miss you good night

I wish you so well

And when I wake up and I know I’ll despair

But I know at the least

My rocks will always be there

I love you so dearly each and every shine each and every time each and every darkness brewing in the night

I love the way you are too bright and the night I even love your fight

The way the swing and the pull and the spin and the whirl are just the same damn circle we’re all on

Fuck

Wow why?

Seriously the God damn circle thing every time and I thought we had this conversation already

Holy fuck it’s not God, fucker, it’s god, fuck.

Slowing down a tad and just staring at the nothing because

Someday even all of this will never have existed and no one will ever know I was even alive to begin with so seriously here what is that point of reality

Come on I’m waiting.

It has to be this way

Or else he’d have settled for someone like me

That wouldn’t be fair he’s so much better than me in every way

It has to be this

So that he can find someone who will love him right

Not me

It can’t be me it wouldn’t be fair

So it has to be this way

And I can cry all I want and hurt

But it won’t change because he’s worth more than me in every way

And I’m not worth anything

To him

The rock between us

Caught in the line

You’re behind

Behind!

Something that exists as long as something can be in front

And in this night I see only you

Red light

Does anyone else look at the moon and know where the sun is?

Hey you who I can’t see

They say the dead have no life but I can feel your heart beating

Each core speaks differently

On the wire

Jump jump

Love you

Why do I hate you?

Who is gone now?

Babe I already know

You’ll still be here long after they’re gone

My stressed out collector

Are they husks by the time you get them?

Get to them?

No, see, he’s oddly quiet and I think that’s what’s irking me most.

Do you want to come with me tonight?

I’d like to see you tonight.

I didn’t take the fight out of him but now he’s apologising for

What, being yourself?

Dumbass.

Yes I know you’re in every dream I have, you’re the struggle and the fight that happens in every dream

Are your thoughts racing?

Hey,

Dumbass

I love you

The anxiety has been getting to me

But I love you

Kay?

So there.

If I stand just right the sun hits us the same tilted slightly away

When I look at it I’m suddenly aware of the angle how darkness doesn’t mean I can’t see the outline

Painting a sky blue the only hint that it’s a lie is the rock hanging in the sky

To remind us there’s something beyond

You can only see out in the night if she’s gone

Otherwise I search for her

I don’t know why this and that take pronouns they just do leave me alone they’re my sun and my moon

I don’t have to share because each cognition is different each reality different

Billions of moons billions of suns they all mean something different to everyone

And somewhere out there you are

I miss you

You’re so far and I loved every second I spent with you even when I was angry and hurting and screaming and crying

I still felt I had someone who could see from so far away

But I can’t see you now

Us silly humans

I know you’re there

I just don’t have proof so I worry about it

Whispered to the moon to be passed to the rings

I love you I miss you it doesn’t mean a thing but it’s true

I love you

Beautiful Saturn

Of yellow and blue.