Elucidating Questions

Ow

Like straight shot to the fucking heart

Ow

And how I want to smile and say

So fucking what

Who needs him

Take him

He’s nothing

And inside I’m screaming

Wrong wrong wrong

Because I followed all the street signs and read all the directions

And I ended up absolutely fucking no where

With no one

And nothing

And I want to smile

And run my nails through the walls

And say

Absofuckinglutely.

This is where I got

Of course I’m wrong

And the tears don’t mean a thing

Just that it hit right home

Of course you’re right

There’s no bigger rejection than absolute silence

It’s the truth

I was wrong

And I’m not worthy of him

Or anyone

I’m not

I just want to sleep

Does cuing love true truly bring any one?

For many a times it would have been best

If only if only

Whoever is writing this novel

Do they see me?

Does anyone see me?

Love true

Who are you?

Where?

And wherefore?

Did I do it wrong?

The spells

The charms

The visualising

Just

Manifest it

They say

So where?

If it’s so easy…

Can I cue you now?

What are you doing?

Where ever you are

Are you asleep beside her?

I’m really not far

Just find myself wondering

As the clock draws near

What it was that stopped you

Dislike or fear?

Did you even wonder

Did you even look

I wanted to meet you

So badly I’ve shook

Is it true?

That instead of see me

You’d rather drown?

Did you even see me?

Or am I still a clown?

I know I’m not good enough for you

But she isn’t either

At this rate no one will be good enough

But you’ll still stay with her

She doesn’t treat you right

But you’ll think this is how you deserve it

You could have anyone you want

And you picked an abusive one

Is that my fault? At least she doesn’t hit you

But she’ll laugh in your face

And make fun of you

And you love this?

Masochists are so sad.

You’re so sad.

You kept me awake last night

Thinking of you

Trying to think of anything else

But still thinking of you

My mind just finds a way to you

Like a glowing beacon of light

But I know I’ll never have you

Nothing makes it right.