Elucidating Questions

Poetry

This is the general category of fuckery that goes on and on and doesn’t seem interested in stopping.

  • You kept me awake last night

    Thinking of you

    Trying to think of anything else

    But still thinking of you

    My mind just finds a way to you

    Like a glowing beacon of light

    But I know I’ll never have you

    Nothing makes it right.

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  • I think you’re beautiful, but you don’t think so

    I think you’re valid, but you can’t hear

    I think you should try

    But what use am I?

    To tell you of a possible tomorrow

    To tell you to just hold on

    What use am I?

    If I cannot make it better?

    How can I help you?

    When I am so damn far away

    What can I do for you?

    Besides spout ineffectual nonsense

    I wish I could help you

    I wish I could make you feel understood

    I wish you didn’t feel alone

    If only, if only.

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  • I don’t know why

    It’s coming up again

    I don’t want to see this

    Stop coming up again

    But it’s only the truth

    And the truth can’t hurt

    What all he’s hurt

    The problem is he isn’t wrong.

    That’s the problem

    There are too many problems

    Too many letters

    How could you not see all these letters?

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  • As if he could ever see me

    Why keep trying

    Pointless.

    Just one word

    Don’t tell me you see me when I know you never will

    How much does it cost to meet you these days?

    Will I ever be good enough to afford to meet you?

    Just once?

    I asked for somebody to love and the universe gave me a man who tried to smother me with a pillow for crying

    Don’t ever ask for “somebody” to love

    I wish I could just reach out and

    It’s not appropriate to touch people you’ve never met

    Can I look at you?

    Or is that too much?

    Can I see you?

    Just for a second

    Just for a second…

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  • Sometimes I think about the family I had

    That loved me because they chose to

    That chose not to love me

    Because the queen of hearts said so

    Sometimes I think it was all my fault

    And sometimes I think it was all their fault

    And when I asked if I was hated

    I was worth nothing more than a vague response

    So were they even ever family?

    I don’t know what family is.

    I know I have a mom, but the feeling of family

    I miss the feeling of family

    I don’t know if I deserved this

    But this is what I have

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  • How are you?

    I know you’re busy

    Could you tell me how you are?

    Cause I’ve been wondering

    And I know you aren’t far

    But I keep wondering

    Just wondering

    How you are

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