Poetry
This is the general category of fuckery that goes on and on and doesn’t seem interested in stopping.
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That stings a bit
Rub alcohol in it
Doesn’t catch the truth
Hanging on the smile of the moon
That it’s a joke
And of course it is
They’re always jokes
But it makes the feelings feel dirty
Do I wash them?
What will be left once the ink runs out into the water?
A handful of coincidences that aren’t as good
Aren’t as real
Aren’t good enough
My love is worthless
My love is eternal
And worthless
No comments on -
Will I miss you forever?
Will it hurt forever?
And, me, a mere watcher.
I want to ask how could you again,
Hear an answer like it would fix everything
Missing you doesn’t bring you back
You follow me through my daily life like a specter
Waiting for the moment to jump out and once again
Remind me you’re gone
I wish I could have saved you
I wish I could have saved you
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Dear Mother,
I’m sorry all we do is take
Never give
But our gifts would be worthless in the sight of your Mothering
I’m sorry we slowly
Methodically
Purposefully
Choke out every life we can
I’m sorry we shape and carve you
As if your face weren’t already perfect
I wish I could cut all their threads of misery to shreds
Stop everything that changes you
Dear Mother,
I love you
In that way that love is worthless and cannot stand up to the sheer mass of you
I wish on stars hoping they’ll send help
Someone to stop us from this terrible deed
I wish I had the power to stop them
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But I love to see the sight of you
Keep you around me just to know you’re there
Alive
Well
Still beautiful
Still
I get so tired looking at you
Like I’ve walked for miles
Carrying everything
And you never look back
Sometimes it feels like another joke
Told at my expense
To feel so strongly for you when nothing
And never
Are all that comes back
If I could trace the shape of you
Keep that for myself
Just a tracing
-
And it’s all coming back to me
Did you say please just follow me?
Express the expression
Are you laughing at me or patronizing me?
Ten thousand coincidences
And I said please just follow me
But you didn’t follow me
So without wallowing
I want you all myself.
One self
Or two
Na na
Na na
Na
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Do you know, that I want to protect you?
Do you know that I want to take those feelings and make them mine and never give them back
Just so that
They’d leave you alone?
Give you one night of sleep
Do you know
Do you know?
That I saw our love written in the stars
In the melody
Ever draining forever explaining
It told me so many things
Did you hear?
Did you hear?
Astoria is mine now
And so it goes I suppose
But I wish I could fight it for you
Like, I did it once, I’ll do it again, send me everyone’s tiny little delusions I’ll write them all a rhapsody that never ends I’ll
I am a silent watcher
Watchers meet watchers with silent gazes, open arms, open eyes, open
What I want and what will be were never meant to see together in the light of day
I mean, I wrote him 2,000 poems.
And that wasn’t even the start of it.