Elucidating Questions

I hate talking on the internet

First of all

Reading comprehension

Fuck

I swear people understood me better when I was in Japan, speaking a language I don’t know all of, than they do on the internet

Then they don’t even read what you’re talking about

And they’re just like let me spew more of my rhetoric

It’s impossible to form an argument because suddenly they’re blaming you for shit other people said to them

It’s so frustrating typing out the exact same thing the third time to make them understand

It’s worse because I swear I speak a different language than humans

While using the same words

And maybe that’s true

Maybe I interact with language differently because I have such strong emotions

Maybe meanings are magnified and twisted

But I’m starting to wonder if these people couldn’t pass the grade 12 English provincial in BC

I always blame myself for my not being understood

It’s like there has to be a winner in every conversation

I was not born with the competitive nature these beings profess

I just want to be understood

Course it’s not going to matter soon, I suppose, if I’m understood or not

I can’t be respected in the place I’ll be living

You know maybe he’s right

Maybe if I just lie down and take just how shitty life is it’ll hurt less

I fought so hard to be understood and ended up alone

I’ll just exist

And suffer I guess

Somehow be okay with there never being any better

No promise of dawn

This is a fucked up world we’ve created

How many more times can I say I’m about to go into my childhood abuser’s household and hear nothing in reply?

Even the keyboards are getting more fucked up

I don’t know why you made this

Society is like a four year old made a huge fucking mess and then presented it to their parents

I don’t know why you did this

It’s a huge fucking mess

I guess you got some good stimulation out of it or something you fucking unregulated toddler

I don’t know why they did this

Greed

What is it?