Elucidating Questions

And now there’s you

My secret to keep

I thought I was free from you in the wild

Yet here you are

Here you are

Immediately upon coming in from the cold

In a place I wouldn’t have come but for the wind

Weeks

Without but a whisper of you

Good

Enjoy playing absentee father

Now here you are

And I’m anything but fine

I’m the one who’s awake and trying

You’re dead asleep

I’ve never heard him on this station before

The Cosmic DJ is stalking me with a person

We’re not doing that any more

There you go, there’s your moment

You’re still on my mind and it still hurts and it still doesn’t matter

That I sing to you

And my house is going to be gone

And my animals are probably going to be gone

And I’m not fucking fine

Cosmic DJ

Why you torment me with him

Don’t you tell me what to do

Up and down

All around

Now you praise me for my spirit

I’ll just have to believe you have nothing to do with the need for it

I wonder if she’s resting well

The past of me

When I put her down and didn’t pick her up again

Told her she was too heavy

We weren’t meant to be

Ah yes

I hope she’s alive and well as well

It wasn’t time for me to take care of others

Yeah it was right around then

Everything seemed right

Was it?

It now seems like another sequence of missteps

I wasn’t prepared for you today

To present me with him

And when it’s on my own device I can skip the song because it still hurts

Don’t let me die here

What does that mean to you?

This a duet where they’re both crying to be saved

Who does the saving I wonder?

I’ve cried out a few times

For all it does

What?

Quit the silence I’ve made of it and go crying again?

There was blood pouring out and they didn’t care

And busy is a four letter word

I’ll understand someday if I notice?

Yeah, that seems to be the way of it

Seeing the signs once they’ve become relevant

Thanks for the warning I guess?

Maybe he is me

Maybe it’s just me

Telling me from the future

Sometimes I think I’m the only person on this planet

Confirmation bias

More of that Trickster’s Light I mentioned once

The Sun is not over there

I did want to move

I did want to get into subsidised housing

But this is too much

And what would dreaming of him do?

I’m usually well behaved

He was the one exception

Never knew why

You just do things

You just force these circumstances

This is the longest I ever lived somewhere

Please let me land somewhere permanent

I’m so full of childhood trauma about moving

My never ending reoccurring dreams

I want to go to a place where if I have to be alone for the rest of my life I can live there until then

I’m so tired of being alone

I’m so tired of you haunting me

I’m so tired of the last year