Elucidating Questions

I feel slightly off today

Can’t quite place what it is though

My arms finally stopped screaming from me pulling apart the sink

Trying to decipher between wind and rain

It’s wind for now

I don’t know why I feel like this

Like I just feel like I’m in a bad mood

But there’s no reason to be

I feel trapped

But I don’t know why

Trying to search my memory for something that might have turned my mood

But I can’t

I’m so exhausted

Probably the weather still flip flopping

I’m lonely

That’s not new, but it’s

切ない

Painful sad

Right now

It’s been a while I guess

A month

Since I truly interacted with anyone

A month and a few days

Maybe it’s the loneliness gripping me

It’s more than malaise

I feel stubborn

Like I am actively not doing something that has been asked of me

But I recall no order?

Feelings are a mystery

I wish I had an identifier

I feel heavy

Like I’m carrying to much

But I’m always carrying too much so what’s new?

And I feel frustrated not being able to identify what’s wrong

Something’s out of sync

But what?