Elucidating Questions

I wonder what I’m supposed to be believing in?

Believe, believe,

It’s repeating and I wouldn’t be surprised if Believe started playing just to cement it in

But, what?

You maddening thing

What?

Wish is a word that seems to disappear

Fade away as all things dropped throughout Time

Why is this the English version?

I’m self conscious about my music

I’m self conscious about my Japanese music

Grew up hearing about how awful it was

If you’re going to listen to that stuff wear headphones

Everyone always hated my music

I always rush to turn it off when someone comes in

Japanese music is more often pitched in my range but I’m ashamed to sing Japanese in front of people

I want to go to a place where I can sing

I don’t have to believe in it, apparently no one else believes what they’re singing

Isn’t it funny that your scream brings me peace?

You never tell me to believe

There isn’t anyone to be wide awake

There was never a sleep to wake from

Dreams of a sick mind

It was so sweet

Was a lovely tale that would have been

All that intent

And in the end

Well, you know

No, I think I’m going to exist without believing for a while

There’s nothing to believe in

Just questions and things I’ve been left to agonize over because there’s nothing else to fill the time

Preoccupied with dreams because that’s the only thing that’s happening

Remembering or not

Oh my god

Don’t remind me about things that made me laugh you

You

What a segway

It’s supposed to be this way

For whatever reason

Reality

This thing that rejects me

The people in my every day life are mostly pleasant

But can’t I have connection?

Isn’t that something I’m worthy of?

I can’t even believe that wholeheartedly

No, nothing

Such a difficult thing you ask of me

So much I’ll never be able to believe in again

My mind is a labyrinth of things that taught me never to trust again