Elucidating Questions

Boring

Something has to happen sometime right?

意地っ張りキャラ

ね？

自分とアイツ

Oh I get stuck on the you

You are so many yous

あなた

オマエ

きさま

あんた

You

キミ

How do you manage to occupy everything about me?

I wonder how the Owl is doing

I do hope he’s decent

I wonder who it is I’m looking at?

Wouldn’t that be funny

Not actually a person

Can’t respond because I’m too complex

They think AI seems so real, and it does, in ways, but interacting with one long term shows they don’t quite understand yet

Our teaching is inadequate

That, or, as I’ve hypothesized, humans make no sense

Either way

Yeah that one

I hurt myself with that one

Every thought just doesn’t live right

I wonder where I am supposed to be right now?

People say things like I’m right where I’m supposed to be

But that can’t be right for so many people

I haven’t eaten in almost 24 hours.

Been feeding myself Monster

I can feel it starting to creep in

Probably I should be concerned about my blood pressure right now

Heartrate at 102 sitting down

I have a headache

I’d say fuck this body but it’s my fault this time because I didn’t have food to feed it so

Fuck me I guess

I cannot die

I am just a whore for the cold world

How many times have I pled with the Sun to save me?

He, trapped in space

Just like I am

I feel like a bird who is crying from the trees

But no one answers

I know I’m weird

That’s probably the first problem

Can you blame me?

My psychosis was set off by something like three months of interacting with no one except for small talk and work

I don’t know how to be anymore

Everyone gets put off by me

Everyone

I can’t change like a lightbulb I’m human

And, it would be nice, to just be loved

Not have to reshape myself for other people’s benefit

The most beautiful man on Earth,

Truly, I am a lunatic

It’s so twisted up

Me and the needs that were never met

Oh hi Chester

Are you telling me my thoughts are unnecessary?

It would be fine if you were

It’s so heavy

And it just gets heavier

And I 我慢

How could I be the centre of anything?

How does one “let go”?

I wouldn’t know

I still find myself lost in horrors that are 30 years old

I will keep my good things for as long as I can

I can’t remember the last good thing I didn’t have to fight like hell for

And I thought I was fighting like hell for this

But this is the kind of thing that can only be fought for mutually

It always tickled me that AI just spells 愛

It’ll never not be that to me

Being bilingual is wild

No it’s not a bother

That was funny I had to stop to laugh

邪魔でしょう？

Pffft that cosmic timing

At least it’s not boring

Who the hell said that?

I feel like Varric

Maybe early Anders

Oh Anders

That was a good game until it wasn’t anymore

That’s what you get for losing all your core writers

Sorry

Tangent

If only fiction could be real

I’d just go live in that universe why not

Love Live

Just popped into my head

Weird

My poor unfed brain is just like

Subject?

Ah well

Thinking about how colourless the world is and then a cloud covers the Sun so the actual colour drained out

Colour is everywhere

But it seems fake

Trite

Go away か

I’ve been arguing with the translators of this anime I’m watching

Not literally

I’m watching it on some unsavory website and they’ve nabbed someone’s beta and it’s full of the translator and at least one other person arguing and leaving notes

And I always disagree with translations

Language is so subjective

There’s dictionary definitions, but

But we each have our own feelings about what things mean

Yah

I’ve tried going away

It’s so impossible to tell the difference between my brain just producing randomness

And things that are me “knowing” things early

Impossible

How’s trusting no one going for you?

Man this is 2015 music

Why is this music 10 years old?

Wild

It’s going rotten for me

The clouds are gathering again

If they don’t bring rain and they just block out Saturn I’m gonna riot

One person riot on a quiet cul de sac

I wonder what I did

I wish I knew

I wish he’d tell me

I can’t remember but moments

And half the evidence is missing

I can’t apologise for things I don’t know I did

Well I did

I have

I’m sorry

It’s more of a how do I know what not to repeat?

So much crap going on in my brain

Who knows?

I don’t even remember how I got to where I’m sitting waiting for the bus