Elucidating Questions

I wasn’t very productive today

Nor interactive

Tried to make coffee

Succeeded

But then passed out for over an hour so it was cold

And that’s just my life now

Can’t put together anything without paying for it

Never getting to enjoy things when they’re hot

This life

As I pulled myself through my tears earlier

People say life’s not fair

But my life is so unfair it’s got to be worth trying to fix

Right?

How many more are like me?

I wish I could live in a dorm or something

One with big rooms

At least I’d get meals

The only way for me to live comfortably it to eliminate rent

Or for an extra $1000 to suddenly exist every month

$200

God

The federal government must think we’re all stupid

It’s too much

This life is too much

I had so much fight in me

And I still have some fight it’s just harder to pull out from all the other things I have going on

It’s also unfair that my only possible way out is to meet a financially stable significant other who would be willing to take on me

I never wanted to be any type of weak person in any distress

I wanted to stand on my own two feet

And now I just feel like that’s never going to happen

I want to find arms to fall into that stand on an equal level as me

I don’t want to be indebted to someone for my care

I hate imbalance

Why else would I have been so stupid about all of this?

I don’t want to live on this planet under the care of someone else

I don’t want to give someone that much power over me

I search for equality

I find none

I’d say I wish they’d all become poor like me but most of them will so it’s be a wasted wish

I wish I lived in a world where I could stand on my own two feet

I don’t know what tomorrow holds but if it’s anything like today I’ll just sleep it away

I just don’t have the will to continue