Elucidating Questions

I’m still in the same emergency as earlier

More exhausted

More subdued

Tomorrow I work

For what?

Nothing really.

My cheque is going to be awful

This just doesn’t seem to get better

And my mental health can’t take anymore

I want to go back to a time when money was a fun thing to have

But I don’t want to go back to the hell of living under my father either

Why did I work so hard?

All that time

For nothing in the end

I don’t want to be a slave to money anymore

Forever indebted to someone

No one could have prepared me for this life

At least I have a warm house to be in tonight

It’s something, right?

It could be worse

God that just makes me want to cry

It could be be worse than this

It probably will be

If you were going to come into my life, now would be the time

Despite the clear sky I won’t see Saturn because I’m going to bed early

Because I can’t face another hour of today

I remember his voice so sweet talking to me

I wish I could go back to that dream where suddenly everything was worth it

Not tonight

The alarm awaits me

Back to work tomorrow

I have to fight

Just to lose over and over and over again

How am I going to ever be good enough to get myself out of this mess?

If you were going to reach me

Now would be a really good time