Elucidating Questions

Have all this gentleness in me

All this anger

I don’t know which is true

I can make words do terrible things

I choose not to

It’s not me being messed with that sets me off

It’s everyone else

Fiercely loyal

To anyone but myself

That driver talking about homeless people being people who just make bad choices

I hate constantly being tested in spaces I could not possibly speak up

What, I’m going to start an argument with the guy who’s driving me to and from my appointment?

Yeah okay

Thanks Universe

I definitely want to be alone in an enclosed space at the mercy of someone I just started a fight with

I keep saying I would fight and then you put me in these impossible situations where I just feel small

I’m not going to fight people one on one in person I can’t defend myself if they attack me

Powerless and small

He really resembles you

For a moment I thought you’d come to rescue me from my inadequacy

Maybe you were speaking through him

I’m not afraid of tomorrow anymore

Mostly just tired of it

One more tomorrow like the last

Soon to be one more yesterday when nothing changed

Today, too

It’s already off to somewhere else

It’s already tomorrow

Today is obsolete

Sometimes I focus on the pain and hold it for a moment

Not knowing whose it is

In order to get my dream back

He’d have to look my way

An impossibility

The most stubborn person on the planet

Sometimes I look at myself and just wonder

Why do you have to love these people who will never love you?

But, you see, I am the second most stubborn person on the planet

And I’m gunning for first