Elucidating Questions

People are always talking about wanting to go back to some time in their life

But when I think of mine there is nothing to look back to

No time I long for

This life has not been kind to me

I don’t wish to be a helpless child again

The world took advantage of me

I don’t wish to be a confused and frustrated and depressed teen again

The world turned its back on me when it realised I wasn’t controllable

I don’t want to be a young adult again

Still confused and frustrated

Still depressed

Now here’s five thousand things more to have to focus on because you woke up 18

I would like the world to go back to the 90s for the sheer need of living better financially but culturally?

I don’t want to go back to that shit

Watching oldies now I feel like I’m watching through my fingers the amount of jabs and punches they make at marginalised groups

The stereotyping

The whiteness

That uncanny white bread culture of every family with little to no influences from outside culture as if America is a haven of one monolithic culture and none else

Every black family is written by a white person and it’s plainly obvious

Every disabled person is inspiration porn

Or a joke

There are no plus size women unless they are ugly and that’s the joke

Just not a good look, all around, the 90s

So, like, I don’t know why people are pining for back in time

Maybe other people have good memories

Maybe other people see something when they think of home

I don’t think I’ve ever been better than now

And considering my position that’s saying a lot

So maybe he’s not getting better

But I am