Elucidating Questions

Today has been about trying to convince myself why to stay awake

Some good things happened

Little good things

Big good things really don’t happen

It’s so hard to tell myself to stay awake when my dreams have the one person I want to talk to

And being awake doesn’t

Even if my dreams are a murky nightmare besides him

I don’t know who the old Japanese man and his wife are

I don’t know why I’m living with them

I don’t know why I pack unpackable rooms

I don’t know why I go to the hospital or go to the pet store or get lost on the buses and trains

And every time I dream it’s the same

But we know eachother there

There is very little in my life to live for right now

Repetitive dreams

Constantly waiting for drugs in a weird ass house with like six other people living there

And my ex

But if it means having that moment

I don’t care if I have to dream through it every time

And no one can offer me a hand

Because they’re all living their own lives

So why not make friends with the people in my dreams?

Wearing familiar faces so I’ll recognise them

I want to see someone in real life

I need someone to see

Please send me someone to see