Elucidating Questions

I wish I could stop reading between the lines

People rarely understand the gravity of the statements they make

If there’s anything to be said of me it’s that I’ll infer something

My brain tries to hard to find patterns

So many aren’t there

I remember when every sign spoke to me

Imbued with the loading of some software that would solve all my problems

Desperate

I’m desperate to be better but the things people tell me I’ve done wrong are things I can’t help

Things like being too depressed

Or talking about how I’m struggling due to poverty too much

It’s like they don’t want me to be aware of how shitty everything is

Join us in oblivion where we pretend the world is fine even though we can’t afford things

And there’s constant war going on

And there are more and more people on the streets

And my body just continues to get worse

For how shitty I feel?

I am an optimistic person

And I always thought, even if I was producing it, I’m a nice person

I always believed my kindness was made up by me, but I always try to be

At least in person to another person

Try to be something positive

I wish someone would see me

The way I see me

No…

If they’d see the parts of me I can’t see

Like the pickled plum on the onigiri’s back.