Elucidating Questions

It’s a big difference

It used to be

I want to die

And now it is

Why don’t you just die?

So it’s not so internal and I’m not longer blaming myself for bad situations

I don’t feel the want to escape to nothing

Rather I’d like whomever is the actual problem to cease their own existence

So it’s progress

Probably better to not wish someone be dead

But at least it’s not me anymore.

I mean, really, better you than me.

I chewed my thumb until it bled from the anxiety

My first reaction is still the same old

But the second one comes with fire.