Elucidating Questions

They begin posting quotes from videos

Everyone knows what’s happening

I don’t

I feel left out

I want to laugh too

I go to search the video up

I freeze

My stomach tightens

I think I may throw up though I haven’t eaten since yesterday

I think

But then I’ll love them more and it’ll hurt and it won’t matter

So much pointless love

I tried so hard

But got nowhere

And in the end it’s wasted love that they don’t actually accept

They pretend to accept it with

Hugs and hand holding

Reaching and sitting up close

Thoughtful thankful tweets and cursory shoutouts via ❤️ or ♻️

All this fake reciprocated love I’m afraid to love and never see myself loved back

Hoarder. You’re a hoarder.

Change my mind.