Elucidating Questions

I love you I love you I love you

But what does that cause?

What does that mean?

Is it the moments you’re nowhere to be seen

But your presence is real

Or the mornings I wake up and turn to find some no one beside me who isn’t right and the night quietly vibrates its lies of harmony and togetherness

Is it

Not Mike on the bus making me think about how it would be so awful if I ever had to be trapped on a bus with you with nothing to say

Who rides the bus anyways?

Is it the pieces of songs that sing sung throughout the day as if a unhearable status update on my condition

Or the moments I yearn to have you close so I can tug on your hair and say

PRETTY

In the way a toddler might

Or how I don’t quite know what to say how to define it

Finding dropped beats in places I shouldn’t be

Is it how I haven’t cried because I’ve been able to hide for the past few days?

And why?

When before it tormented me like nothing and I had erased most of them and I just had to hear a Masterpiece

At which point I crossed my heart and hoped to die

That you’d understand

This is how I run to you

Every time.