Elucidating Questions

If you want to occupy the space in my vagina just do so already

Rent is cheap

Just situate yourself on my bed for a short while and we’ll talk about how you can’t touch me there

And no talk to touch no eye contact

Like with Ceser Millan?

You will ask

If you’re into that sort of thing I guess

I will answer

But oh no oh no something terrible has happened

I have said

The v word

Scores upon scores of doodled phalluses

Thousands of years of penis jokes

We knew how to perform penis surgery

Before anyone knew what was actually in a vagina.

Think about that.

Cutting pieces (at the time for sanitary reasons, now because people are insane in the membrane) off of a penis was regular practise

Before

We knew what was inside a vagina.

So like men in Lysistrata walking around with giant phalluses attached to them?

Jolly good show.

Me making casual reference to the parts I have

Women can’t even do that who knows what I am

But there was probably a pause.

Just so we’re clear a bunch of women running around dressed as gaping holes that have weird folds and spurt blood 12 weeks of the year

Is not what I’m after.

Less people running around singing about life as if their genitals hang out outside their pants

Maybe

God when did the world get so sexually frustrated?