Elucidating Questions

I woke up and you’re still not here

Who do you think you are existing when I can’t get to you but I always have the feeling you’re missing?

What was the point in waking up if you’re never going to be here and don’t you dare

Fucking tell me the purpose of my life was to be alone so I would learn how to be alone because I don’t want this I didn’t ever want this I’ve been afraid of this since I was four years old standing on the other side of a door in time out afraid I’d be kept there forever and everyone would leave me and my parents hated me

I’m just living a nightmare why is this my life?

I woke up and you weren’t there and I don’t want to think about all the stuff that happens when everything makes sense because it makes

No sense to anyone but me

And I’m all alone and there’s nobody home and I have been fighting the urge to just lie on the ground and quit and give up but I

I was afraid to be alone but now I’m just alone all the time and it’s nothing just like me the hours go away and every single day I’m alone and I don’t want to

Why do I have to wake up if you’re not here?