Elucidating Questions

Half a year

Nothing to show.

Grand dreams and planned out adventures that never quiet took.

A road untravelled, with a gate locked shut

I regret everything

The regrets turn to tears and I don’t know why I was suddenly worried

Or why I decided to make it show.

I don’t remember any of it but the taste the actions left

It’s gone.

I keep whispering

I want to erase 2018,

I have nothing to show

The meaning of being lonely is tears and

Last Friday night

I don’t remember.

Nor any before that.

I don’t know what day it is, I don’t know what happened any day I don’t remember.

But I know I have something to feel guilty for,

And that’s all.

I remember a line here or there

In the moment otherwise nothing.

I wanted to say thank you why did it get twisted?

What’s wrong with me?

Which question are you answering?

I don’t want to talk about

Yes

And the fucking chorus that followed

It only means I’m even less important than I thought.

The magic was never the question.

Well aware I have no place to go.

If my history of failure catches up with me now,

I don’t have a future.