Elucidating Questions

If I say I need you

Like I do

I have to see the wreckage

Of over half a year of nothing just

Trying.

I don’t know why it had to be like this

I don’t know why people make it like this

I could almost say that if I had others I’d be okay

Almost

But it would be a lie.

You’re always on my mind.

I can’t get you out of my head.

Why?

Without even a glance in my direction why am I so stuck here?

Every time I go to

Let go

Of anyone I think of how much it hurts to be let go of and I hold tighter

But you never said you wanted me,

Not even just alive.

So if I need you

Then why?

あなたは今どこで何をしていますか?

I am here,

Waiting.