Elucidating Questions

Marching on like a good little soldier with no way. Just putting one foot in front of the other in this endless

Continuing

Solitary march.

I could map the skies for you but I don’t know how long a chicken fucking McNugget cooks for.

Wishing every plane a safe trip while stuck on the ground the flightless bird.

Every morning starts with the realisation that it’s morning.

Not waiting for dawn to break anymore I know that light never comes and every day is painted in these same shades

Of shame, guilt, and blame.

It can only be hell.

Music used to mean something it was above the rest it had a feeling and I felt safe in it and I thought I would always have music,

Except it sings lies like finding the one or holding on to what is important and

I never had a chance.

Not even one.

Every day is just another sentence in hell.

This hopeless helpless disgusting waiting

I’m not stupid

I know no one is coming

Once I didn’t,

But I won’t get fooled again.

I can’t let myself believe in the good that other people could be or they will hurt me and I can’t take anymore but I

Keep marching on like a good little soldier.

A regular fucking citizen.

Never thought every hand I reached for would slam a door in my face,

Mistaken.

You’ll get what you need now.

The words sting like poison.

Begging for anything but solitude please anything but being alone every single day please don’t leave me alone like this I’m going insane from being so alone please

Please someone help me.

And the words fell so I believed them.

Something I need, I believed.

Don’t stop believing.

Keep…

But I can’t anymore.

Because I never got what I needed.

I have no one left.