Elucidating Questions

If I could set you alight like you set me and show you

Show you I trusted you in silence with every fibre of my being

Would you walk on by?

Do you even recall my name?

I watched from so far away, this call that I would like to answer.

I still don’t have a reason, but.

Holding on only because I have this notion of this feeling of this someone that won’t leave me alone

There’s no way around it,

It happens to me too,

Suddenly it’s about him,

And the old words sting sometimes when I see connections.

I want a place to start too

Is there any word that would fit?

All I want to do is have another moment that could never exist

Because he points and says

I told you so.

And I know when it is and isn’t I can hear it.

It’s not about me either,

But the title says it all

This after the trauma that I fight or the hole I drown in I

Found the wolf in New York

I don’t know why it connected there,

I can’t get everything right that would be too easy,

But none of this has been easy, has it?

Don’t be stupid

The frustrated light in the end says

You know it’s not what they want it’s what the monsters want

But if that was true,

Why do I still feel like he’s not forgiving me for something

As the quiet messenger sits and watches,

Knowing I can’t believe anything I hear and that the feelings scare me because I don’t want to believe that it’s real anymore

If it is I’m going to fall apart alone.

The question was

Do you believe in me

And the answer was yes but

I’m afraid accepting the feeling I get would make me exactly who I wanted to see.

Some copy.

Or a similar soul

Awkward laughter

He only wants me to keep your promise.