Elucidating Questions

After all the time keeps moving somehow, when I wish it would just stop so I could find the pieces and put them back together

Because every morning I wake and it’s with no one, and it feels every day like I just do as I’m told.

I wish I was going home,

I wish I was going home.

Stone crumbled away, pieces like clay

Someone come pick up the pieces with me,

I’d like to say,

Deja vu of tears as that stray drop falls.

All I see is empty tears,

More shots taken

When every day is a battle with myself to stay alive

Could have and should have and won’t

Because I’m still stuck on that line,

That tells me I shouldn’t take what isn’t mine.

So in misery, because that is all I can give me at the beginning of the hour,

I still don’t know because I did,

But he didn’t notice

Or he did

And I broke it.

Or something.

Or it doesn’t matter,

And unfortunately I’ll not be able to know the answers

As they’ve taken the word away.

Forever forever or whatever.

I just do as I’m told.

300 terrible reasons, or something similar.

I don’t see what I want anymore, do you see the unraveling

Of the stupid tapestry I built

Or the crumbling of the towers

Or the end of May.

The pieces are just scattered,

To the four winds,

Screaming to the winds, in silence,

I keep me alive for what if,

Kept making failsafes that failed.

I never missed the insomnia, keeping the day light through the night,

Maybe the wind would miss me.

See because I keep running out of people I want to burden with me.

Running to the elements to see if

Who knows.